“Huh? It’s starting already.”
The water in the electric kettle hadn’t boiled yet, but Qiao Liang temporarily ignored it and entered the game.
The game started with nothing at all. No opening animation, no options, just straight into the scene.
In the vast desert, a winding road stretched into the distance.
The game’s perspective was inside a car, with a simple instruction interface. The controls were divided into keyboard and gamepad, exactly the same as the mainstream racing games on the market.
Qiao Liang looked at the graphics and the controls, feeling that they were passable.
After all, it was using a template. The upper limit wouldn't be high, but the lower limit wouldn’t be too low either.
Qiao Liang picked up the gamepad from the side, connected it to the computer, and started the game.
The car started.
Qiao Liang drove along the desert highway.
The time in the game was morning, and the sun had just risen, so the light wasn't too harsh yet.
Sand and dust kept flying in the desert, and sandstorms could be seen in the distance. These sandstorms would affect the game's visibility, sometimes making it very low.
The desert road snaked forward, not in a straight line, but with a turn every so often.
“Click.” The water in the kettle had boiled.
But Qiao Liang was driving the car, lost in thought.
What am I doing?
What should I be doing?
What does this game want me to do?
He had been driving for three minutes, and had indeed made a few turns, but...
Other than that, he didn't see anything that interested him.
Driving, turning, watching the sandstorms blow in the distance. Other than that, the game had nothing.
There weren't even any other cars passing on this desert road!
Qiao Liang wanted to go and make his instant noodles first, so he subconsciously pressed the menu button.
But there was no response.
Qiao Liang: “???”
In other games, pressing this button would pause, but in this game, pressing it did absolutely nothing!
Qiao Liang thought it was a bug in the game, that it didn't support gamepads, so he successively pressed the Esc key, space bar, and enter key on the keyboard...
Still no response!
This game can't be paused!
Qiao Liang was completely shocked.
In the interval of his shock, he didn't pay attention to controlling the car's direction, missed a turn, and drove off the road, the tires sinking into the sand.
[gAmeover].
Eight simple letters appeared on the screen.
Qiao Liang opened his mouth wide, completely stunned.
This game refreshed his understanding of bad games!
No, strictly speaking, this wasn't really a "bad game."
"Bad games" are usually the result of the creators' lack of skill or funding, objective limitations, and compromises that result in a crude and shoddy feeling for the player.
But this game wasn't like that.
It seemed to be deliberately trying to disgust people!
Otherwise, why wouldn't it even have a pause function, and why would it be game over every time you failed, without any save points?!
“Wait, this game seems a little interesting…”
“If I make a video roasting it, maybe it'll go viral?”
Qiao Liang hurriedly poured hot water on his noodles, then ate them while studying the game's name and description.
“Lonely Desert Road. They even emphasized ‘lonely’!”
“A simulated driving journey to contemplate life... Hmm, indeed, I am really contemplating life. This description didn't lie to me at all...”
“So, it seems like this game is really full of malice!”
“The company that developed this game is called Tengda Network Technology Co., Ltd. Never heard of it. It seems like this is their only game.”
“Tsk…”
After finishing his instant noodles, Qiao Liang picked up the gamepad again.
But this time, he opened the video recording software, ready to record his entire gameplay.
……
Three hours later.
Qiao Liang was slightly distracted, missed a turn, and the car sank into the sand. Game over.
“Ah!”
“F*** f*** f***…!!!”
Qiao Liang almost smashed the gamepad on the table in anger. Three hours!
He had done nothing for a whole three hours except drive in the desert, and the gAmeover on the screen ruthlessly declared his failure.
Three precious hours of his life had just slipped away, creating no value other than wasting electricity.
And the recorded video was useless. After recording for a full three hours, only the last few seconds could be used, to be edited into a montage of failures.
Qiao Liang threw the gamepad on the computer desk and stood up to calm down.
He didn't smash the gamepad, because he was poor.
After all, a gamepad like that cost more than two hundred yuan. If he broke it, Qiao Liang would be heartbroken.
“Hoo…”
“Calm down.”
“This is all for work.”
“Good, this game has successfully aroused my anger, which is a very good quality for a garbage game.”
Qiao Liang quickly regained his composure.
As an up-and-coming video creator who specializes in roasting trash games, he's seen it all. He should be able to handle this little scene.
But Qiao Liang also realized that beating this game wouldn't be easy.
It was a challenge!
So, Qiao Liang called and ordered takeout.
Fortunately, the game ended early, otherwise the delivery service wouldn't be available anymore.
During this time, Qiao Liang lay on the bed and took a nap to recover his energy.
After waking up and eating his fill, Qiao Liang put a large glass of water on the table, ready for a long battle.
He had begun to understand this game.
Is this game difficult? No.
Anyone with hands can beat it, no exaggeration.
There are no tight turns, no police cars that will come and mess with you, and there are no requirements for the player's speed.
The only difficulty is time!
He hadn't finished the whole course in three hours, and he didn't know how long the road ahead was.
In order to finish the race faster, players will habitually accelerate, using the car's top speed to run, but this requires more concentration, otherwise they may not have time to turn when encountering a curve.
Once you run off the track, you have to start all over again.
If you want to be more stable, you have to drive slower, but in this way, the game time will be even longer.
“What a坑爹 [keng die] (pitiful/screwed by dad), really 坑爹 [keng die] (pitiful/screwed by dad)!”
Qiao Liang felt that his desire to challenge and roast was higher than ever before.
If this game can be made into a roasting video, just the title can trick a lot of clicks!
Qiao Liang gritted his teeth and continued to enter the game to fight.
……
More than eight hours later.
Late at night.
“Holy crap!”
“I cleared it, I cleared it, I actually cleared it!”
Qiao Liang almost wanted to cry. He finally saw the finish line!
It was a very common finish line, using what seemed to be common art resources that many racing games have, but for Qiao Liang at this time, the black and white checkered finish line on the ground was so亲切 [qin qie] (warm/intimate).
He was almost moved to tears!
He held the gamepad and stood up from the computer chair.
His back ached, his hands were cramping a little, and his eyes were almost unable to open because he had stayed up too late.
But, he had persisted for a full eight hours!
It was all meaningful!
Qiao Liang was touched by himself. What kind of spirit was this!
At the moment he crossed the finish line, Qiao Liang felt like a racing god had possessed him!
At this moment, he was the most dazzling guy on the track.
However, the screen went black, and a line of text appeared.
“Congratulations, you have successfully wasted 8 precious hours of your life!”