Hello guys… so today’s the big day.
11th February has come again.
I took the day off, got my mental up, and tried to piece together the puzzle of last year.
Since the last few days Keiko helped too, sitting beside me with a notebook like some crime drama partner. We talked about what time we fought, when the snow started falling, and how everything spiraled out of control.
I remembered it was evening — I was supposed to work overtime, but I ended up getting fired. What a masterpiece of a day that was.
Keiko said she wanted to come with me this time because she was worried. I told her no. It could be dangerous. But, well, it’s Keiko. If stubbornness were a sport, she’d have three Olympic golds by now. She insisted.
I prepared the same clothes I wore last year — the same worn-out jeans, the same old coat that barely fights off a breeze, let alone a snowstorm.
Checked the weather too. 80% snowstorm warning tonight in that area. Fantastic. Just the way I remembered it.
As the evening rolled in, my stomach twisted itself into a knot. I couldn't sit still. My hands were cold, but it wasn’t from the temperature. It was nerves. Anxiety. Regret.
What if I screw this up?
What if I don’t make it back this time?
Rin came home. “Dad, you’re going today?” she asked.
I nodded. “Yeah.”
She tilted her head. “Shouldn’t we fight later then? Y’know… to make it more identical?”
I chuckled despite myself. “What are you talking about? Not a chance. I didn’t want to hurt you or your mom again… I’ve regretted that day every single second since.”
Rin smiled, and for a moment, I swore I saw my little girl again, the one who used to fall asleep in my lap during movies. “Good luck, then.”
I hesitated. “Hey… Rin. Do you… miss me? I mean… Ryusei.”
She didn’t even need to think. “Not really.”
I blinked, caught completely off-guard. “Eh? W-Why?”
She shrugged. “I dunno… maybe it’s because Ryuko doesn’t give me any trauma. Honestly, I kinda like you more as Ryuko.”
That one… ouch. That hit somewhere between my ego and my soul. I went speechless, my mouth opening and closing like a fish. But I guess I deserved that.
Rin noticed and softened a little. “B-But, you should still try to go back. I know Mom likes it more.”
She tried to coat it with a half-hearted smile.
I forced a grin. “Thanks, Rin… sorry for everything.”
“Good luck, Dad,” she said, then vanished into her room, probably to play her game or text Chiyori.
---
Finally, it was time.
Me and Keiko set out after dinner. The snow fell like tiny white needles against my face. The cold gnawed at my skin. The wind howled like some ghostly choir. The last time I ran away from home in a hurry. This time… I was facing it head-on.
Keiko noticed me shivering. “You okay? I brought another jacket.”
I shook my head, puffing out my chest. “Nah. I wanna keep it authentic. Gotta stick to the script.”
She smiled, eyes crinkling. “You idiot.”
I chuckled. “You married me, so what does that make you?”
“An idiot’s queen,” she shot back.
20 minutes later, we almost arrived in the area. The storm picked up, and the world blurred into endless white. My legs felt heavy, my breath sharp in my throat. I noticed Keiko slowing down, her steps unsteady.
“Hey,” I called out. “You sure you wanna keep going? We can turn back.”
She waved me off, though she was panting. “I’m fine. We can’t let this moment pass.”
Stubborn, I told you.
I took her bag to lighten her load. She tried to protest, but I shut her up with a quick kiss.
Her cheeks reddened like a schoolgirl’s.
God, I love this woman.
I grabbed her hand. “C’mon.”
The snow thickened, the wind howled louder, and soon everything around us was just white noise. I started losing track of where we were. Everything looked the same. I glanced at Keiko’s face — pale, lips trembling.
Panic clawed at my chest. I fumbled in the bag, grabbed the spare jacket, and wrap it over her.
No response.
“Keiko! Are you still with me?!”
She opened her eyes weakly and gave me a ghost of a smile.
My heart shattered. I hugged her tightly. “Dammit… I won’t lose you. Not this time.”
Last year, I ran into this storm hoping to die. Hoping to disappear.
Now, I’m here to fix what I lost.
I looked up at the endless swirl of white and gritted my teeth. I’m not dying here. I can't die yet. Not while I still have things to make right.
I tried to carry Keiko back, but my legs were lead. My lungs burned.
I slipped — the world spun — and we both tumbled into the snow.
Darkness swallowed everything.
---
I woke up to a splitting headache.
Am I dead?
The cold gnawed at my bones. My eyes opened slowly to a dim, grey world. Snow still blanketed everything, but the storm had stopped.
I tried to sit up, my whole body protesting.
And then…
I saw it.
Keiko’s glasses. Lying in the snow next to me.
Panic shot through me like lightning.
Where is she?!
I scrambled up, grabbed the glasses, and turned in circles, scanning the white void.
My vision blurred. I blinked.
Why the hell is everything so fuzzy?
I put the glasses on instinctively.
And the world snapped into focus.
Wait… what?
I looked down at my hands.
Small, slender. Smooth.
No. No no no no no.
I tugged at the coat, looked at the clothes.
Pink scarf. Black baggy pants. Soft beige coat.
This… is Keiko’s outfit.
My stomach did a backflip.
No. This can’t be.
Am I… Keiko?!
I screamed internally.
God, you have the worst sense of humor!
I stumbled forward, nearly slipping in the snow. “This is ridiculous! How does this even—?!” I yelled at no one. And then cursed when the wind blew snow into my mouth.
I limped my way toward a nearby house I vaguely recognized.
As if the universe wasn’t done messing with me yet, I slipped again, face-planting in the snow.
Everything went black again.