Jiang Nan Fang returned home to find the children already asleep.
The house was temporary, and the children's room was set up like a typical family's, for one child, with only a large bed.
But the four of them were accustomed to sleeping together, and they still squeezed in.
The two older brothers lay in one bed, with their sister beside them.
The four of them had their heads close together.
A small night light was on in the room, casting a soft glow on the walls, bathing their cute, childish faces.
Jiang Nan Fang pushed the door open and entered barefoot, kneeling by the bed, gazing at their sleeping faces for a long time.
As she watched, she couldn't help but see Zhan Bei Jue's shadow in their faces again.
Their daughter was fine, but the two sons, their thin nostrils, high-bridged noses, and the curve of their lips.
They were so incredibly alike to him.
Recently, Zhan Bei Jue had given her too much companionship.
When they slept at night, he would tirelessly let Jiang Nan Fang rest her head on his arm.
Jiang Nan Fang could touch his warm body with every movement.
But now…
She was used to being alone, and she didn't feel lonely without company.
The fear was that someone would suddenly intrude halfway, make you accustomed to having someone by your side, and then withdraw.
The immense loneliness, without a drink, under the erosion of the long night, was truly hard to resist.
Before the matter was resolved, fueled by anger, she didn't have much energy for sentimentality, and it didn't feel too difficult to bear.
Once she truly calmed down, and the outcome was decided, the aftereffects all surged forth.
Jiang Nan Fang couldn't describe the immense heartache and pain she felt when she saw the children and thought of Zhan Bei Jue.
From childhood, she had been accustomed to forbearance and restraint, ashamed to express weakness, and she couldn't describe her suffering.
Moreover, now, in front of her only two friends, she had built herself up to be an invulnerable female warrior.
A female warrior wouldn't be sad or fragile; she would never let others know she could be fragile.
Only at times like these, when no one could see or hear, in the quiet of the night.
Could she dare to show her true self a little.
Her heart felt empty, a restless discomfort, she sat on the floor of the children's room and cried silently for a long time.
She began to have difficulty breathing, her head felt dizzy, and she had to go to the bathroom to clean herself up before quietly leaving.
After she left, the thoughtful children's eyes all opened.
They were worried that Mommy hadn't returned so late and hadn't slept at all.
Ge'er sighed first: "Alas, seeing Mommy so sad, I even want to tell her the truth."
Tian Tian: "Daddy said it's not time yet, forget it, let's bear with it."
"Then I'll send Daddy a message to tell him Mommy is sad. Otherwise, he won't know anything, and Mommy's tears will be in vain."
Seeing the message from his daughter, Zhan Bei Jue's heart was as if cut by a knife.
He was working overtime to handle a group business, preparing to finish this before personally investigating the person who had framed him.
Work was frustrating, and he wasn't sleepy to begin with. Seeing Jiang Nan Fang's sadness, his heart sank, and he lost all his mood.
He closed his laptop and stood by the floor-to-ceiling window, looking out at the distant night sky.
The Zhan family villa was like a magnificent castle, with so many rooms that it could accommodate over 100 people at once.
But now, besides him and a few people who took care of his daily life, it was as quiet as a ghost.
In the past, when he returned from work, he could always see Jiang Nan Fang's smiling face and the children running around.
Now, standing alone in the darkness, how could he not feel lonely and isolated?
Especially since Jiang Nan Fang was disobedient and punished her body for his mistakes, which made him feel immense pressure.
She had just had a miscarriage, didn't she know what drinking meant for her?
At the same time, he also hated himself for being born into such a family.
If it weren't for the messy relationships of the previous generation, if his mother hadn't used her tragic fate to morally blackmail him.
How could he have ended up with Jiang Nan Fang in such a state?
After finishing a cigarette, the feeling of annoyance didn't dissipate; instead, he felt more energetic.
Tonight was destined to be sleepless, so he picked up his phone and called Lu Mingzhe.
When Lu Mingzhe was heartbroken a while ago, he and Jiang Nan Fang were still inseparable.
It had been too long since his heartbreak, and he had forgotten what it felt like, only thinking he was useless.
At this moment, he felt he understood Lu Mingzhe better than ever.
Lu Mingzhe answered after the phone rang for a long time. The background was noisy, and it was clear he was drinking at a bar again.
"Where are you? I'll come find you."
Lu Mingzhe was already disappointed in his friend.
"Why are you looking for me? Shouldn't you be sleeping with your wife on this beautiful night instead of coming to bother me?"
"Stop the nonsense. Are you still at the old place?"
"Where else would I be if not at the old place? Going home alone is still a drag…"
"Got it, wait for me, I'm coming to find you."
Soon, the two met.
Zhan Bei Jue didn't want to be stared at in the noisy crowd, so he pulled Lu Mingzhe into a private room.
They didn't turn on the lights, each lounging on a sofa, a bottle of wine in hand, talking in low voices.
"What's wrong? Did you have a fight with your wife, and you've come to complain to me?"
Zhan Bei Jue didn't answer him, slowly taking a sip of wine.
"How long do you plan to keep this up?"
So he had come to persuade him.
Lu Mingzhe immediately sneered, "It's none of your business how long I keep this up. It's meaningless, life is meaningless."
"Every day, besides eating, sleeping, and making money, it's just eating, sleeping, and making money. Day after day, mechanical for decades, utterly meaningless."
"Whether you have money or not, whether people respect you or not, whether you succeed or not, in the end, you're still going to die."
"You succeed, I fail, accepting the end early is quite good."
Zhan Bei Jue understood his self-abandonment.
There was a time when the workload was heavy, and he had no one close to talk to, and he felt life was meaningless.
No matter how much money he earned, no matter how highly he was praised outside, when he returned home, he was just a lonely walking dead.
He knew too well the feeling of having no spiritual sustenance, of not knowing what to strive for.
Fortunately, at that time, Jiang Nan Fang had given him two children…
"Since you miss her and can't leave her, go find her. You drink like this every day, getting alcoholic liver, drinking yourself to death, vomiting, what good does that do?"
Lu Mingzhe knew it was useless.
He sneered and raised his arm to cover his eyes.
"You think I don't want to find her? You don't know how cleanly she left."
"I have people checking her whereabouts every day, and for so long, there's been no movement on her bank card or ID. Where can I find her?"
"Damn it, I've even checked all the hospital systems nationwide, thinking she might go for regular prenatal check-ups, but the hospitals can't find any information either."
"Old Zhan, tell me, am I that bad? How could she leave so decisively, so cleanly? Is there really nothing about me worth her staying?"