Chapter 120: Drowning
It would have been nice to still have her actively in his life but they were worlds apart and the best option was what he chose.
Setting up everything with Hiroshi was the best distraction he could have from his thoughts. It was already lunchtime when they were done and Haruki could feel hunger setting in.
Haruki slumped on the settee and closed his eyes.
"Are you hungry?" Hiroshi asked as he approached the sofa.
Haruki opened his eyes and looked up at the man realising he had decided not to fight this night. It was not a decision made consciously but with everything they did before lunch time, he felt like he had done a lot and didn’t feel like going out at all.
"Do you have anything I can eat?" Haruki replied to his question with another question as he walked to the fridge. The refrigerator had been restocked and he easily reached for the bunch of grapes.
"I will cook something right away," Hiroshi said, following him said with a bit of urgency when he noticed Haruki had taken something to eat.
"Okay," Haruki murmured as he washed the grapes at the sink while Hiroshi went to bring out the necessary thing he needed from the fridge.
Hiroshi thought of all that had happened when they arrived and he could not help but connect it with the hug he gave Haruki. That seemed to have meant a lot to Haruki for him to turn so nice, at least nice enough to play house with him a bit.
He sighed when it occurred to him that he might be overthinking and Haruki’s moods are very unpredictable and he could win the man’s attention and connection now but it was something he could lose with a little mistake.
Holding the bowl of grapes, Haruki walked behind Hiroshi and curiously asked, "What are you cooking?"
"Do you want a simmered beef and rice bowl or steak?" Hiroshi realising he hadn’t asked Haruki what he wanted to eat, turned and asked him.
"Simmered beef and rice bowl," Haruki replied without hesitation. He loves steak but there was something very homely about eating Japanese food.
"Sure," Hiroshi replied and forced himself to turn back to the table. He was only a second away from smooching his lips against Haruki’s.
Unknown to him, Haruki had the same thought. He wanted so badly to kiss the man too and he felt at a loss when the man turned away to continue what he was doing. Without a second thought, he turned touched the man’s shoulder and turned him to face him.
His hands snaked around the man’s waist and hugged him. Sexy, handsome . . . too handsome. He watched the man move closer until their face almost touched. Even close up, the doctor was so handsome.
His long lashes, beautiful brown eyes, his nose, and his lips are so inviting. Haruki ran his tongue over his lips just in time for the doctor to press against his lips and tongue. Sensual, wet and hot deep kiss with their bodies pressed together.
The doctor’s hand had gotten to his waist and under his shirt. From his waist, he touched the man’s ribs and slid up to the small sensitive part of Haruki’s chest. Just as their lips parted, Hiroshi though aroused, gently pushed Haruki away.
Haruki met his gaze with a questioning look before glancing downward. When he met the man’s gaze again, he smiled and took a step back as though accepting defeat.
Hiroshi’s hands moved fast and wrapped around Haruki’s waist and pulling him back to himself. His gaze fell on Haruki’s lips and Haruki could easily see the hunger in his eyes but when Hiroshi moved closer to kiss him, Haruki turned his head away and removed the man’s hands from his waist.
"I’m hungry," he murmured as he walked away from the man.
Seeing Haruki leave him, felt like a great loss to Hiroshi but he felt no need to rush things after all, the man was still in his house and he had plans to make that last for as long as possible. If his absence made the man change his mind from staying in his house then his presence could change his mind once again.
The only source of confidence he had for that was the workout equipment that Haruki fit perfectly into his once-empty living room. He always went downstairs to work out in the past and he saw nothing wrong with it but Haruki must have had the intention to stay for a while if he had bought them.
His plan was to make that happen and to prolong it for as long as possible. He came to the conclusion as he turned to continue prepping lunch that if he succeeds in spending almost every day with Haruki like this and Haruki replaces him at the end of the six months, then he was not worthy of Haruki.
He applauded his self-control when he completely gave up considering how he desired to touch the man but after being apart for a while, it was as though both of them were trying to make up for the companionship they missed rather than something sensual.
Considering the dish Haruki chose, Hiroshi had to spend more time making it compared to the other option he gave Haruki. By the time he was done and tried to invite Haruki over to eat, Haruki had fallen asleep on the sofa.
He pressed his lips to form a thin line before walking to the beautiful being sleeping peacefully. Haruki’s long lashes, his lips so alluring, he ran his finger slightly over them.
"Are you done?" Haruki asked without opening his eyes.
Hiroshi hadn’t noticed that Haruki was asleep when he sat on the floor to have a better look at Haruki’s face. The face he missed, the face of the man he missed so much. A word was at the tip of his tongue but he knew better than to say it out to Haruki.
"I am done," Hiroshi replied leaning closer to Haruki’s face and resting his chin on the sofa so close to Haruki they could easily kiss.
"Hmm," Haruki hummed, his voice deep and sexy before he opened his obsidian eyes to face Hiroshi. Even so close, the man still looked so handsome. He moved closer and sealed their lips in a short smacking kiss.
Hiroshi could feel warmth creeping up to his face even as he pressed his lips together to hold back a blushing smile.
"Let’s eat," Haruki said lazily as he stood up and walked to the well-laid table. He sat down and picked up his chopsticks. The food didn’t look very professional although it smelled and looked like good homemade food.
Hiroshi now sitting before Haruki eating lunch in his home wished so badly that their life forever looked this way. What was a dream life better than eating lunch with the beautiful man he was in love with?
As someone who had always followed the plan of others for his life, this was the first time he desired something and what he desired just happened to be a human.
A man who had the freedom to either reciprocate his feelings a not. A man who bans love confessions among his lovers. A man so warm yet so cold. He wanted so badly to be a part of the man’s life. It hurt just a little bit but moments like this were enough to drown him in so much love.