Chapter 251: Chapter 181 Freeloading
Li Banfeng returned to Chu Er’s residence and saw that Chu Er was still sound asleep. He quietly entered the Portable Residence.
"Oh my husband," his wife exclaimed, "how did you get hurt like this?"
Li Banfeng was indeed seriously injured, his face swollen and bruised to the point of being almost unrecognizable.
"Wife, I have something to ask you. Do you know Bitter Granny?"
"Bitter Granny? Which Bitter Granny?"
"The Bitter Granny from Bitter Vegetable Manor."
Li Banfeng had asked the Wine Gourd, the Tang Sword, and even the Judge’s Pen about this. None of the Magical Treasures around him recognized Bitter Granny.
It’s possible that some memories had faded along with the Soul’s disappearance, or maybe they never knew much about Bitter Vegetable Manor to begin with. It seemed that only his wife knew about this.
CLICK-CLACK-WHIRR... HA!
"The Bitter Granny from Bitter Vegetable Manor!"
"Right," Li Banfeng nodded. "Is she the Local Deity of Bitter Vegetable Manor?"
CLICK-CLACK-WHIRR... HA!
"Oh my, oh my, she’s not the Local Deity."
His wife knew Bitter Granny, but her tone was a bit strange.
"Oh my, oh my, if she’s not the Local Deity, then what could she be?"
Why was his wife questioning me now?
Li Banfeng reached along the stylus arm and tickled his wife under the arm. "Wife, are you alright?"
His wife didn’t laugh. Why wasn’t she ticklish anymore?
HISS... HISS... HISS...
Steam spouted rapidly, gears spun quickly, and the flames in the boiler leaped high.
Li Banfeng quickly added water to the tank, afraid his wife’s boiler might run dry.
What had happened to his wife?
"Oh my, oh my, if she’s not the Local Deity, what could she be? What could she be? HOO HAHAHAHA!"
His wife suddenly burst into wild laughter, and the whole main room filled with Steam.
"Wife, what’s wrong with you?" Li Banfeng became anxious.
"Who are you?" The Phonograph’s voice became monotonous, its singing tone eerily cold.
Li Banfeng replied, "I am your husband."
"Oh my husband, did you come back with groceries?" The tone in his wife’s voice softened again.
"Today... I didn’t buy any groceries."
"If there are no groceries, then you are not my husband. My husband never lets me go hungry. Who exactly are you?"
Li Banfeng didn’t know what to say. Suddenly, a whirlwind blew into the outer room. Red Lotus whisked Li Banfeng into the room and firmly shut the door.
Sounds of explosions came from outside the door. Li Banfeng worried about his wife’s condition.
When the noise quieted down a bit, Li Banfeng immediately went out the door. He found the Phonograph unharmed, but the room was uncomfortably hot.
"Wife?" Li Banfeng called out.
HISS... HISS...
After a few puffs of Steam, the Phonograph responded, "Oh my husband."
Thank goodness, she still recognized me. Li Banfeng sighed with slight relief.
HISS... HISS...
"Did my husband bring back groceries?"
Li Banfeng didn’t know how to answer.
He saw the Songstress Flower standing by the wall. If it really came down to it, he could feed it to his wife. But it only had its Spirit Attribute left; its Soul had been eaten. Would his wife even fancy it?
In his predicament, his wife suddenly asked, "Husband, who has hurt you like this?"
That question again. Had his wife lost her memory? Had she forgotten what had just happened? He couldn’t answer carelessly this time. If I say I was injured by a ruthless person, and if my wife asks who that person is, it might jog her memory of Bitter Granny and make her go mad again. I must try to divert my wife’s attention so she doesn’t associate it with Bitter Granny.
"It was a few fur thieves. They outnumbered me, and I couldn’t fend them all off, so I was injured."
"What kind of fur thieves?" His wife was very angry. "Were they Traveling Cultivators? If they are, bring them home, and I’ll kill them! HO HAHA, I’ll kill them!"
Li Banfeng shook his head. "They were not Traveling Cultivators."
"Even if they’re not Traveling Cultivators, bring them home anyway! Anyone who harms my husband deserves to die! Little Servant will kill them all! HU HAHA!"
His wife was still a bit abnormal.
Li Banfeng agreed, "Right, we’ll kill them all. Wife, aren’t you tired? If you are weary, then rest for a while."
HUFF...
The Phonograph yawned.
"Actually, now that you mention it, I am a bit tired. Husband, you can go after those fur thieves later; let Little Servant rest for a moment."
While his wife hadn’t fallen asleep yet, Li Banfeng took out the Old Teapot and said to her, "Now that I’m a Fourth Layer Home Cultivator, the seal on this Magical Treasure should be breakable."
"Oh my husband~ This Teapot is of too high a level. If you unlock it now, it might be harmful to you."
"Wife, you’re being too cautious. Wasn’t Zhong Desong only at the Second Layer and still used it all the time?"
"He was a Bitter Cultivator, able to withstand the torment of this Teapot. Fine. Please bring the Teapot here, husband. Little Servant wants to speak with it first."
Li Banfeng brought the Teapot close to the Phonograph. Although he had the Technique of Insightful Spirit Sound, their speech was too fast for him to catch clearly. He just saw the record spinning continuously on the turntable, with intermittent sounds of dense gongs and drums coming from the speaker.
His wife was clearly intimidating the Teapot. The two seemed to be negotiating the cost of the Magical Treasure.
After waiting for more than five minutes, his wife exhaled a breath of Steam. "The matter has been settled. The cost of the Magical Treasure must still be paid.
"Before, its cost was too high; using it once would scald the master. But now the cost has changed. It only requires my husband to take a hot bath."
Li Banfeng looked at the Teapot. "Isn’t that the same thing?"
"Husband, don’t worry. The bathwater will not be too hot, and it will not hurt my husband."
Using a Magical Treasure and getting a free bath out of it? Could there really be such a good deal?
Li Banfeng was skeptical of the Teapot’s motives. His wife yawned, "Husband, Little Servant is truly sleepy now. I will go to sleep first."
With his wife asleep, Li Banfeng took the Teapot to the Fifth Room.
The Fifth Room was at the end of the Third Room, the furthest room from the Phonograph.
The room was empty and bare, as the Fifth Room had just been opened up and Li Banfeng had yet to furnish it. Holding the Teapot in his hands, he asked, "Do you know of Bitter Vegetable Manor?"